Archive for December, 2009

mixed messages

December 31, 2009

We live in a funny world.  The messages we are bombarded with day in and day out are as mixed up as a banana spinach smoothie.  It is impossible to tell where the banana ends and the spinach starts. 

Take the example of being thinner.  I am sure there are studies about how many times a day we hear or see weight loss ads.  Those together with the images of the thin beautiful people with beautiful lives that we are all supposed to aspire to be like creates a non-stop assault.  The message this sends is:  to be more, we need to be less.  The smaller you can make your self the more beautiful and successful you will be. 

So, people go about their lives waiting to be smaller.  They eat chemicals (i.e. not real food) praying that they will one day feel good enough.  And they think that when they can finally fit into a pair of size 2 pants and get by on 1300 calories a day they will be happy.

I am fairly sure this is a flawed idea.  You cannot be happy in life if the focus of each and every day is trying to make yourself disappear.  If the goal is always to get by on less and less how can you ever feel that you can do more?

People should never stop growing and learning, and that is so much harder if you don’t feed yourself.  And here, I am not just taking about cookies.  I have gone about my life trying to figure out what I should cut out to make it better.  Some cuts have been good (meat, dairy, sugar substitutes, weight lifting) and others were made out of financial necessity and slightly flawed logic (yoga and ballet classes, going out).  Though some of cuts have been positive, the point is they didn’t come from a positive perspective.

Therefore, the new name of the game is not to think about what I can get out of my life to make it better, but what I can add to make it HAPPIER.  Because happier is always the goal right?  So some things are coming back.  Ballet and yoga classes for example.  Some things have been have been around for awhile, leafy greens (who would have thought leafy greens could add happiness to a life?), hanging out with my dog, running.  There are new things too, blogging is one and I am sure I will come up with lots of other things. 

I am not out to live a mundane life.  I will not be satisfied if the only goal I ever accomplish is teaching my self how to be skinny.  What I need to learn how to do is expand (and here I am not talking about pants size), how to keep growing, keep evolving and that comes from giving myself something that I need (again, not a cookie) and that is joy.


Why Wait?

December 9, 2009

          If the only time is now then why do we wait?  Some of us wait to be thinner, richer, smarter, more settled, more organized.  Some of us wait for a stroke of brilliance and inspiration.  But really what are we waiting for?  And what are we missing out on while we are waiting? 

            There are some things I have done without waiting.  I did not wait until I was really good at yoga to become a yoga teacher.   I did not wait until I could run a 9 minute mile to run a half marathon.  I started massage school as soon as possible.  I hardly ever wait to have snack, call my mom, take a nap, or snuggle a cat.

            In most cases though, I put myself on hold.  How can I start blogging until I have a brilliant first post?  Shouldn’t I wait to call a friend until I can go out with them or at least have something really good to say?  Couldn’t I learn a new sonnet now, or read up on yoga, Buddhism, or philosophy today? 

            What part of us, or better yet, what part of ME thinks its easier and better to wait than to do the things I want to do?  Is it laziness? Fear? Self-sabotage?

            What is the answer?  I am sure that I do not know.  But first things first, when I notice that I am waiting, I will stop.  For now, start a blog.

            What will you find here?  Probably a little bit of me.  Yoga, running, vegan food, cat and dog pictures, a little soul searching.  I’m not really sure yet.  But I do know that I’m not going to wait any longer to find out.